Category Archives: River of January

House Rules

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Tass had had a bad night. She hopped up on the hour to meet the demands of cleansing medications, followed by gatorade chasers in preparation for a morning procedure. I wasn’t exactly perky myself, between traveling all day to care for her, and worry over what the morning would bring. Waking and dressing was of little consequence–we were fully alert before 7 AM.

Tass chirped obsessively that she hadn’t properly cleaned her system, and she fretted over controlling herself until we reached the clinic. My ridiculous attempts at small talk proved no distraction to her intensity–she could hardly hear me.

Her summer had been a tough row to hoe. Digestive problems plagued her every step, literally as well as figuratively. Tass had taken up running and was beginning to truly embrace the sport when her insides began to betray her. So now, after fruitless medical appointments, we were off to the digestive health center to literally look up “her old address,” in the words of M*A*S*H’s Captain Henry Blake.

Two receptionists manned the front window. One young lady, a bit stocky in build, with thick, dark, kinky hair greeted us. The other, a tall thin blonde, scurried back and forth, running from this computer to that, a phone clutched to her ear. She paid us no mind.

Behind the glass, their station had been cheerfully decorated with a variety of Fall memorabilia. A yellow duckie with turkey feathers roosted on the computer, while a vampire ladybug observed us as Tass completed reams of paperwork.

Our secretary wore a hippy-print smock, festooned with peace signs, and little faux buttons saying “Love,” “Peace,” and “Happy,” covering the fabric. Her bustling co-worker was clearly an active Utah Jazz fan. A poster bearing #20 decorated her station, with game tickets posted beneath, and her purple and yellow lanyard bore her swaying hospital ID.

Their cheerful surroundings and attire did not reach the region of their faces. Not a smile could be detected behind that glass window–nothing but purposeful business. Only the plush lady-bug smiled, and she wanted to drink our blood.

In a no-nonsense fashion the receptionist requested Tass’ deductible payment. A sign next to her desk echoed the demand. Payment Due On Day Of Service. That’s code for “cash on the barrel-head,” or we would proceed no further into the facility. Exhausted from the restless night, Tass handed over her payment, then miserably darted to the restroom.

Combining worry and sleep deprivation we had no smiles to compensate for any lack in the receptionist. Tass’ registration process became a mutual, somber wash.

Staking chairs in the waiting room, we were now at the mercy of the clinic’s time table, trapped in the belly of a whale.

Fox news narrated our anxious wait time–time that permitted a more in-depth appraisal of the office suite. There were paintings hanging on the walls, and they were lovely, too. Scenes of Canyonland National Park–Zion, Moab, etc . . . But strangely they only rendered some others as distinctly odd.

Enclosed in black frames were official disclosure documents, about four in all. Enumerated were lists of office policies dotted behind glass, all absolving the clinic of any responsibility for this or that unforeseen outcome. Costs may vary from quotes, Payment due prior to services, Physicians may or may not claim financial interests in this clinic, and other arcane declarations.

“Man,oh man,” these dudes have it all covered,” crossed my thoughts.

The medical staff, in contrast to the muscle in the front office, were all beyond wonderful and compassionate. We couldn’t help but adore Tass’ nurse from the get-go. The doctor was nothing if not an angel sent from above. Her care was superlative from pre to post treatment. And Tass came out with with a good result.

But still, the duality of healthcare is troublesome. The icy chill of the relentless business angle where there is no personal concern, can not help but eclipse the heartfelt goodness of skilled providers.

Whether outcomes are good or bad, diagnosis positive or negative, the house wins.

Oh, That’s Today!

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There were times when I’d be blathering along on some historical subject, and in a sudden epiphany realize, “and it happened today!” One time, displaying a before-and-after photo of the USS Maine in a lecture on the Spanish-American War, it dawned on me that the date was February 15, 1898–that very day. “Oh, that’s today!” sprang from my mouth. Various reactions crossed the many faces of my students. Ranging from, “she really needs a life,” to “that might be mildly interesting, but it’s not.” My kids seemed to exude more sympathy than interest in my sudden, self-induced enthusiasm. “Geez, don’t all hop up all at once,” was my usual sardonic response. Then they would laugh.

December 7th got a nod, September 17th, Constitution Day, and my personal favorite, “The Seventh of March Speech.” That one you ought to look up. Finest speech made in the Senate to my way of thinking. I made a practice of asking a baritone-voiced student to read Daniel Webster’s words if March 7th fell on a school day. There’s May 8th, V-E Day, September 11th, March 5th, Boston Massacre–all acknowledged and more to boot.

Today I presented a book talk on River of January for a local service club. I shared the story of Chum’s epic, 1933 air race, (that he won) soaring through the night sky from Los Angeles to New York. Chattering happily I flipped to the slide pictured above. This is the actress Helen Hayes awarding Chum his first place trophy at the Capitol Theater on October 4, 1933. The Capitol was premiering Miss Hayes’ new film, Night Flight, and the race was somehow wound up with the movie. Well, that was 81 years ago today. So of course, I grew just as ridiculously excited as I used to in my history classes. “Oh. My. Gosh. That’s today!” And I will commend this group of adults for not judging me as harshly as my eye-rolling students. These fine people laughed–as happy as I felt with the coincidence.

So there it is. Chum won the “Darkness Derby” on October 3, 1933 and Miss Hayes handed over cash and a trophy the following evening in New York.

It was a Wednesday night, October 4th, that Chum’s life dramatically changed exiting that theater. He now had award money, and a trophy that proved his merit as an up-and-coming pilot holding his own in the Golden Era of Aviation.

When My Worst is My Best

This piece dates to last November. Worth a recycle.

gail chumbley's avatarGail Chumbley

The tumor institute quickly became far too familiar, an unsolicited home away from home.  He’d press the down button on the stainless steel elevator, lowering us into that stark, beige basement–the waiting room.  An ordeal.  I pretended to be brave. 

The smell in the unit was a combination of baby powder and rubbing alcohol, probably from the hand sanitizer dispensers positioned everywhere on those bland beige walls.  Fox News blared from a 12 inch television in the corner— while stunned patients and family members stared.  Health magazines and pamphlets were scattered on cookie cutter office chairs and faux-wood end tables. 

We didn’t belong in this surreal place and neither of us were prepared for what was coming. 

Walking phantoms, hairless and fragile, shuffled awkwardly, angular-ly across the nondescript carpet, escorted by unnaturally jolly nurses dressed in flowery scrubs.Patients ambled down one of two passages traversing this subterranean ward.  A straight…

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But I Had Other Plans!

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This post comes from last year. Not much of a throw back Thursday, but a powerful reminder for those of us affected by cancer.

gail chumbley's avatarGail Chumbley

I clearly remember the day my husband told me he had throat cancer.  The news was so impossible to believe that I honestly wanted to reply, “No, Chad, you don’t, we don’t have time for cancer.”  I tend to resist any emergency that I can’t package up and manage, or eliminate by a force of will.

As he stood in the kitchen, his hands resting on the sides of the sink, tears filled his eyes.  I read in those tears that he had given up and accepted his medical condition, and that made me mad.  We weren’t going to lay down and admit that the big scary C-word would take center stage in our lives.  It wasn’t convenient–medical procedures would be scheduled when I had to work, or had other commitments to fulfill.

I couldn’t see past the treatments, the financial burden, or the fear a cancer diagnosis leaves in…

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Cocolalla

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We had two cabins on a small lake in Northern Idaho.

Located between Lake Coeur de Alene, and the Pend Oreille, our little acre overlooked tiny Cocolalla, with large windows where we could watch the waves lap up on the beach. The original structure we astutely named the Little Cabin, later followed by the larger Big Cabin. This bigger cottage had been built with all the amenities of home; running water–hot and cold, a tub and toilet, a full kitchen, and electric heat.

Those early weekends in the Little Cabin hold many good memories. All of us crammed into that tiny wood box, the unfinished walls festooned with a lifetime of greeting cards, a big enameled wood stove, and a porcelain basin for washing dishes. Grandpa got his hands on a tall steel milk can and commandeered it for enough drinking water to get us through the weekend. As for entertainment, Grandma had an old radio that blasted the most impressive static, interspersed with Roy Orbison or Andy Williams fading in and out.

Once the Big Cabin was completed and my grandparents moved in, the smaller cabin was demoted to storage. It also housed a set of bunk beds, a fold-down couch, and one double bed; useful for my brothers who were just getting bigger. Now, in addition to greeting cards, the cabin stored every variety of water equipment. Fishing poles, life jackets, oars, and an outboard motor clamped to a metal barrel, with stacks of beach towels the size of blankets.

As I recall, a constant grit of sand coated the linoleum floor.

The property was my grandparents retirement dream, but a dream they happily shared with the rest of us. I knew, even then, that I was always welcome, always.

My grandpa was an early riser, a product of a lifetime as a mailman. He didn’t want to tiptoe around a little kid sleeping on his sofa at five in the  morning. At bedtime my grandmother and I made our way to the Little Cabin in the dark by flashlight. Under the covers of  the double bed, I would chafe my feet deep under the sheets to warm my toes. As we grew settled and peaceful she would begin to reminisce, talking to me for hours in that darkness. I learned of her life in those moments, warm in that cozy bed, listening to her voice, breathing the scent of the evergreen forest.

She told me of my biological grandfather, her first husband, who had left her bereft and penniless after my mother had been born. Despite the Depression, he liked to gamble away their money. My Grandma had to leave him and she struggled to find work as few jobs existed. Forced to farm out her daughter, my mother, in various homes, her the guilt still haunted her. Clearly it still broke Grandma’s heart that she was forced to separate from her little girl for months at a time. I could hear a wound that could never heal.

As the night grew deep, crickets and bullfrogs began to chorus. Flanked next to her, and pressed against some greeting cards, I prayed I wouldn’t spoil the magic by having to go potty. She kept, beneath the bed, a Chase and Sanborn coffee can that I hated to use. It felt cold and left rings on my little bottom. Still, considering options, the can was more appealing than a journey to the outhouse. Using that creepy outhouse in the daytime was bad enough, but at night unthinkable.

Finally poking her lightly, I would tell her. And she never hesitated. Showing no impatience at all, Grandma seemed to make my problem her own, reaching for the flashlight and finding that rusty can. She held the light on me so I could aim properly, then back into the warm bed. No recriminations.

She loved me.

I loved her.

Today my husband and I live in the woods. We don’t have a lake, but a river runs near and we can hear it on very quiet nights. I relax in my cozy bed in the darkness and listen to the crickets and bullfrogs, while breathing in a scent of pine. A sense of complete security, of love, of acceptance returns, synonymous with the love of my grandmother. She was home for me, and though gone these many years, my mountain cabin still echoes with her voice.

Gail Chumbley is the author of the two-part memoir “River of January,” and “River of January: Figure Eight.” Both are available at http://www.river-of-january.com and on Kindle.

gailchumbley@gmail.com

Waiting is the Hardest Part

Funny, but this blog still resonates a year later.

gail chumbley's avatarGail Chumbley

My son forwarded a Huffington Post story featuring the rejections endured by prominent authors.  I know that he meant it as a kindness, that everybody struggles in the book business.  Still, despite his good intentions, the story brought me down.  The business end of publishing always leaves me with a chill.

Writing, though sometimes a struggle, has been an affirming experience for me, delving into a story of risk and adventure.  I’ve been in the cockpit in an air race, suffered through butterflies waiting to go on stage in Paris, London, and Buenos Aires.  Now that the story is with the editor, I have to face the next battle–getting noticed by a publisher.  That arena is about money, markets, and deal-making.  And though I understand there are other options for getting River of January out there, those alternative routes are just as mystifying.

For any of us trying to get…

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How Many Presidents Are You?

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A life can be measured in a variety of ways. Most customary are calendar years, but except for birthdays, Driver’s Licenses, Voting, Social Security, and Medicare that approach is hardly an increment that shapes all people. Haphazard events, personal, national, or global can chisel changes as permanent, and indelible as any wrinkle or gray hair.

In River of January my central characters celebrated long lives filled with extraordinary adventures. Montgomery “Chum” Chumbley came of age in an uncertain world of rural isolation. His was a harsh environment of feast or famine, drought or flood, butchering livestock for food, and cruel, sweaty labor. His life offered narrow and limited opportunities–still trapped in the unchanging mold of the 19th Century.

William Howard Taft presided over the White House the year Chum was born. There were no niceties like electricity or indoor plumbing in his world. In fact the White House itself had barely installed electricity, running water, or a shelter for automobiles. Yet, by the time of Chum’s death in 2006, George W. Bush had ordered spying satellites and drones over Iraq, and NASA’s Space Shuttle program was headed into retirement. The last years of his life, Chum used a computer to keep up with his friends, and along with his television, he was current on world affairs.

Taft to Bush, seventeen presidents. He lived seventeen presidents. I’ve only lived through eleven. My parents thirteen so far, and my  own kids, five.

How old are you in president years?

What I Heard

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Ken Burns has done it again–hit another historical piece of film over the wall. I’ve enjoyed Burns work for decades, beginning with “The Civil War,” through “Baseball,” to “Jazz.” He has consistently combined solid historical research with the subtle beauty of an artist. But in his new “Mark Twain” biography I made a discovery I once believed impossible. I watched the film without any historical analysis or comment.

For the first time since publishing “River of January,” I watched simply from a writer’s perspective. In the film, scholars discussed how Clemens didn’t find his unique American voice until well after “The Innocence Abroad,” and “The Prince and the Pauper” were published. Twain’s masterpiece, “Huckleberry Finn,” came after years of hesitation until that singular voice could no longer be kept tethered.  The author reached deeply from his childhood–a bigoted world of ignorance, poor grammar, and slang with a twang. He defaulted to what he knew best, his inner core and colorful life.

That resonated with me in my own struggle for voice. I have come to realize that a personal truth has to come off the page to remain in the manuscript. If the story line, or flow of dialog doesn’t resonate, it has to go. There must be a truth to tell. The obstruction of a badly worded sentence, or contrived  idea hangs uneasily in my psyche. I have to write what I know to be authentic. It’s a weird dynamic too, and takes concentration to pull off. I put myself in the scene–whether it’s a cockpit, or a dressing room. From that bit of time travel I can survey the setting, describing it both physically and emotionally. I understand the importance of familiarity.

In another tidbit from the documentary, Ken Burns examined Clemens daily writing regimen.

At his home in Hartford (I’ve been there, it’s so cool) Twain worked in an upstairs room, away from everyone, committing his tales to paper. Each evening Clemens gathered his family and friends to listen to  his day’s bounty. I found that intriguing–not as a historian, but as a writer. (Twain had many notables among his friends, President Ulysses Grant for one.)

Samuel Clemens made writing his day-job, and used his household as an audience. Something I find I am unable to follow. However, my ears were carefully adhering to that writing schedule revelation, contemplating his patterns.

I too, need quiet and solitude, but don’t produce the same way. My engine needs to rev up before any writing session. I think and think and think (like Winne the Pooh) then inspired fire up the old laptop. The historic record can spark my thought processes, and the Chumbley archives also can prompt a productive writing session. All in all, a “fits and starts” style best describes my method. Both “River of January” and the new one “Figure Eight,” have come to life through my haphazard style.

Mark Twain can stand alone as a historic figure, apart from his brilliance as a man of letters. He belonged to a political group known as the “Anti Imperialist League,” opposing unrestrained immigration, especially from China and the Philippines. He disapproved of  John D. Rockefeller and other greedy Robber Barons, making no friends among the elite. All that I all ready know, and taught for years. The astounding thing is I watched the program hearing only the literary journey of an American lion.